Offers I Can Refuse

The vanity publisher I used for four collections of my previously published stuff emailed me yesterday with this great limited time offer.

Here is what the package includes: We will create your Basic Book Trailer for you and we will also put it on Infinity Publishing's You Tube Channel with information of where the book can be purchased.  We will create 500 Facebook likes to your Facebook Fanpage.   If you do not have one we will create it for you.  Plus you will receive 10 Book Reviews on Amazon and Goodreads. Visit our website to purchase this NEW Marketing Package and take advantage of the Special Savings!!

Despite the publisher's attempt to take advantage of me, I'm so not taking advantage of this amazing offer. Why not? Because it's a waste of money and will have no real effect. Who, for instance, would buy 500 Facebook likes? And where are those 500 likes coming from? Are there folks out in FB-land who don't care what they like and sell their like-ness to the highest bidder? Or did the "publisher" create 500 fake FB users to use for liking pages. Either way, this has unethical written all over it.

As for the "basic" book trailer, how would a reader—who hasn't even heard of your book—find your book trailer on YouTube, which has gazillions of other book trailers. The "publisher's" list of YouTube videos are here. Of the 29 (that's how many were there when I checked), seven were promotions for the company. One of those (http://www.youtube.com/user/InfinityPublishing/videos) was kind of a 49-second Christmas card that had mini-second exposures of Christmas-related books. A whopping 77 people had viewed it since it was posted on Dec. 7, 2012. This one (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwDJALkmFm8) was a minute and forty-two seconds of 2-second views of lots of book covers. I thought it was a hoot that a rival vanity press had an ad on it.

And what about those "reviews"?  Do I really think that 10 reviewers are actually going to read one of my vanity-pubbed books and post a review? What's that review going to include. A lot of folks are aware of fake reviews on Amazon: here and here and here. Or maybe the "publisher" will hire Harriet Klausner?

And $495 for this crap?! I hate to think that someone will actually pay this. But a lot of vanity publishers offer similar packages for even more $$$.

Others have also jumped on the author scam bandwagon. Last week, a friend who had self-published his own book, sent me a copy of this email:

Dear Publisher:

Join me for the Beijing Book Fair, New York Library Association, and the Frankfurt International Book Fair.

Display Your Book For:
* Bookstore Buyers * Agents * Publishers *Retail Buyers * Distributors *Public Librarians * School Librarians * Universities * Distributors * Wholesalers * Colleges * School Systems * Foreign Rights Agents * Multi-Level Marketing Agents * Shopping Network Buyers *

Book Shows Offer Fantastic Benefits Including:

* No Travel Stress & Expense * Cover Facing-Out Display *
* Catalog Listing & Distribution * Online Database Profile*
Upcoming Book Shows (click link to learn more & buy online)

Beijing Book Fair:Aug 28-Sept 2, Beijing, China
*purchase placement deadline August 5th  $190 New York Library Association: September 25-28, Niagra Falls NY
*purchase placement deadline September 8th $120

Frankfurt International Book Fair: Oct 9-13, Frankfurt, Germany
*purchase placement deadline August 12th $190
We display one copy of your item cover facing out!
Interested attendees contact you directly through our exhibit catalog!
Buyers are looking for new and exciting titles for sales, rights and exposure!
Save Time and Money by allowing us to display your book!

 Essentially this means that for a good chunk of change. this "company" would display one copy of your book—facing out, no less!—among gazillions of other books at the book fair. Just how many folks do you think will actually pick your book up? And if they do, who will talk to them about it? How will they know where it's available?

If you're self-published or vanity- published, your main way of selling your book is going to be out of the trunk of your car—or at least in face-to-face situations with potential buyers. Don't waste your money on promotional scams schemes that won't work.

But, if you want to throw away your money, pay me $50 and I'll drive around the county with a copy of your book on the dashboard of either my 94 Dodge truck or my PT Cruiser (you choose!) and I will park in the Kroger or Walmart parking lot for at least 15 minutes so passersby can see your book. Plus—for no extra charge—I will post on Facebook a picture of your book being looked at by a very cute kitty (again, you get a choice of which kitty). Finally, I'll comment on your FB page or your blog (again, you choose!) the following comment: "Hey! You wrote a book. Nice going!"

Is that an offer you can't refuse, or what?

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