Whirled Books
Warning: A scam rant.
The other afternoon I received a phone call. I couldn't quite understand the caller's name because she had a heavy accent. "May I speak to Mrs. (moment of hesitation) Moooosh-ko?" she said.
Uh-oh. Mispronunciation of my name and an accent. Had to be a telemarketer or someone soliciting votes for a political candidate.
"This is she," I said. I figured I'd waste her time for a bit. The woman, obviously reading from a script, launched into a spiel for marketing my book. Uh-oh. Not another one of those! Odd she didn't give a title—just, "your book." So I interrupted her: "Which book?"
I swear I heard sputtering. Finally, "The Girl Who Raced Mules," she said with an upward inflection, as if she were asking me. I'll bet she Googled me while she was sputtering.
Uh-oh. My vanity-pubbed short story collection from 2003. What the heck—?
But she got back on script. The company she was plugging—which sounded like "Book World"—could help me market my book via the internet. For instance, they'd send e-mails to—
"That's spam," I said. Then I mentioned another company who wanted to do that for me. "I thought I'd never get rid of those spammers. Do you know they wasted my time by sending me e-mails about books I'd never heard of and didn't want to know about?"
She didn't respond—I guess her script didn't cover that—so I explained to her that "The Girl Who Raced Mules" was published long ago, and I wasn't promoting it anymore. I told her that my latest book was marketed by my publisher, and I based my promotion on the publisher's marketing.
I think she had trouble processing this. She tried to go back to her script and read a part about inviting me to a marketing conference. I was losing patience, so I interrupted: "Where is this conference?"
"It's done by phone."
Huh? Then she mentioned it would only take 10 minutes of my time. At this point, I asked about the authors her company—Book Whirl, not Book World—was marketing. She sounded a bit flustered but eventually gave me a name and a book title. I immediately went to Amazon.com where I found the book was vanity-published in 2006 and had no Amazon ranking—which meant it had sold no copies through Amazon. There were no professional reviews—and not any amateur reviews either. Looks like the, uh, marketing didn't help that 72-page novel.
I had a few more questions about her company, which I knew was a major scam, so she referred me to the website: here. Oh, dear. That is one dreadfully designed website.
No doubt picking up on my skepticism, she then wanted me to check their testimonials. Oh, dear! Another bad sign. I wasn't impressed. The rather generic testimonials didn't even mention how well the authors' books did after paying Book Whirl to market them.
And how much did they pay? Well, the Book Whirl "Email Advertisement Campaign" ("a unique book marketing method that reaches a massive audience through electronic mail (e-mail) ads") will spam 500,000 people for only $699 and up to 10,000,000 people for $3,499. Their "OnLine Directory Listing" ("posting a book ad, consisting of a thumbnail book cover, book details, and a 25-word “blurb”, to various sites that have high traffic rates") begins at $299 and goes up to $1,499. BUT, they have some specials! For only $1,299, you can have a Web Design Lite, 1M -mail advertisements, and 100 online directory listings! If you want more (and why would anyone is his/her right mind want this in the first place), you can spend up to $3,999 for the "Premier Package." (I wonder if that includes a tattoo for your forehead that reads "I'm a sucker.")
Lest you think that their website is filled only with their self-promotions, they offer some handy-dandy marketing hints for free! For instance, here's a tip about where to hold your book launch:
So I should hold the launch for Stuck, my middle grade novel at the VCU library? I really don't think I should ask my friends to travel over 150 miles for a launch. (It'll be on March 29 at the Franklin County Public Library—in case you're interested.)
Here's #5 from their tips "Checklist for a 5-Star Book Event":
Anybody else notice their problems with verb tenses? I guess I'd better go "get the public involve."
Meanwhile, here's an item I found posted on Book Whirl's Facebook page (I removed names and avatars):
I'm not the only blogger who has mentioned this company. Check out this one.
The other afternoon I received a phone call. I couldn't quite understand the caller's name because she had a heavy accent. "May I speak to Mrs. (moment of hesitation) Moooosh-ko?" she said.
Uh-oh. Mispronunciation of my name and an accent. Had to be a telemarketer or someone soliciting votes for a political candidate.
"This is she," I said. I figured I'd waste her time for a bit. The woman, obviously reading from a script, launched into a spiel for marketing my book. Uh-oh. Not another one of those! Odd she didn't give a title—just, "your book." So I interrupted her: "Which book?"
I swear I heard sputtering. Finally, "The Girl Who Raced Mules," she said with an upward inflection, as if she were asking me. I'll bet she Googled me while she was sputtering.
Uh-oh. My vanity-pubbed short story collection from 2003. What the heck—?
But she got back on script. The company she was plugging—which sounded like "Book World"—could help me market my book via the internet. For instance, they'd send e-mails to—
"That's spam," I said. Then I mentioned another company who wanted to do that for me. "I thought I'd never get rid of those spammers. Do you know they wasted my time by sending me e-mails about books I'd never heard of and didn't want to know about?"
She didn't respond—I guess her script didn't cover that—so I explained to her that "The Girl Who Raced Mules" was published long ago, and I wasn't promoting it anymore. I told her that my latest book was marketed by my publisher, and I based my promotion on the publisher's marketing.
I think she had trouble processing this. She tried to go back to her script and read a part about inviting me to a marketing conference. I was losing patience, so I interrupted: "Where is this conference?"
"It's done by phone."
Huh? Then she mentioned it would only take 10 minutes of my time. At this point, I asked about the authors her company—Book Whirl, not Book World—was marketing. She sounded a bit flustered but eventually gave me a name and a book title. I immediately went to Amazon.com where I found the book was vanity-published in 2006 and had no Amazon ranking—which meant it had sold no copies through Amazon. There were no professional reviews—and not any amateur reviews either. Looks like the, uh, marketing didn't help that 72-page novel.
I had a few more questions about her company, which I knew was a major scam, so she referred me to the website: here. Oh, dear. That is one dreadfully designed website.
No doubt picking up on my skepticism, she then wanted me to check their testimonials. Oh, dear! Another bad sign. I wasn't impressed. The rather generic testimonials didn't even mention how well the authors' books did after paying Book Whirl to market them.
And how much did they pay? Well, the Book Whirl "Email Advertisement Campaign" ("a unique book marketing method that reaches a massive audience through electronic mail (e-mail) ads") will spam 500,000 people for only $699 and up to 10,000,000 people for $3,499. Their "OnLine Directory Listing" ("posting a book ad, consisting of a thumbnail book cover, book details, and a 25-word “blurb”, to various sites that have high traffic rates") begins at $299 and goes up to $1,499. BUT, they have some specials! For only $1,299, you can have a Web Design Lite, 1M -mail advertisements, and 100 online directory listings! If you want more (and why would anyone is his/her right mind want this in the first place), you can spend up to $3,999 for the "Premier Package." (I wonder if that includes a tattoo for your forehead that reads "I'm a sucker.")
Lest you think that their website is filled only with their self-promotions, they offer some handy-dandy marketing hints for free! For instance, here's a tip about where to hold your book launch:
Here's #5 from their tips "Checklist for a 5-Star Book Event":
Meanwhile, here's an item I found posted on Book Whirl's Facebook page (I removed names and avatars):
Yeah, draw your own conclusion. . . .
I'm not the only blogger who has mentioned this company. Check out this one.
~
Labels: scam
posted by Becky Mushko | 9:08 PM
1 Comments:
Yikes. Thanks for the warning. It sounds scary!
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