Peevish Pen: Tanner's Summer 2018 SOTK Report

by Tanner

House-Cat-in-Charge

I haven't done a State of the Kitty Report for a while, so here goes:

Me and Arlo. I raised him from when he was a little kitty.

The big news is that I had to get a job. Daddy told me I've been here more than five years and it's time I started pulling my own weight. I'm a long tall thin cat, but I don't weigh much. So I wouldn't have much to pull. But he wasn't talking about pulling anything. He wanted me to go to work. Why didn't he just say that?

Camilla and Olivia don't have to work, I pointed out. Mommy explained they were old and retired. They both sleep a lot, so I guess retired is more tired than just tired. I think it means they are tired all over again. Then it was pointed out to me that Chloe and Jim-Bob go out very early and work all day patrolling around the house. After a full day of cat-work, they come inside and crash.

Anyhow, I was recently assigned to working night-shift rat duty in the garage. I like to go in the garage in the evening after it's closed up. That's when Mommy lets me and Alfreda (and sometimes Arlo) out there to hunt the rat. Truth be told, when we first went out, we had never actually gotten a garage rat, although we know that one sometimes hangs out there. At first, Mommy only let us stay out about two hours. That wasn't enough time to get any cat-work done. But one night she let me stay in the garage all night by myself. The next morning, I had the rat corpse nicely laid out for her. Right in front of the door so she couldn't miss it! A few nights later, Alfreda stayed with me, and two rats went down. I don't stay in the garage every night, but often enough so I can claim that I'm working.

Alfreda might be transferring to outside patrol during the day with Chloe and Jim-Bob. Mommy has taken her out on the leash a few times and let her look around. Alfreda seems to remember things from when she was a wild kitty.

Alfreda sleeping in a box.

The other big news is that we took in a few refugees. We had a big storm on June 10 that caused us to lose power for a while so Mommy couldn't play on her computer. It rained really hard. Chloe took off work early and came in, but Jim-Bob didn't. Mommy went on the porch and called him, and heard a cat answer her. She looked under a chair and found a tiny litle runt of a kitty. Naturally, she brought him inside and that's how we got Otis, even though I pointed out that we didn't need any more kitties.

He was pretty scared and he was wet. I kept my eye on him in case he was trouble. Mommy quarantined him in the downstairs bathroom because that's where all new kitties have to stay when they first get here. I stayed there myself when I was a new kitty.

The next day she let him out to play a little since he was getting used to the place. Arlo, Alfreda, and I watched him play but we didn't get close to him. Alfreda growed a lot.

The day after that, Mommy brought him upstairs and let him get in the bed where Arlo and I had been napping. She told us we better be nice.

I had to explain some of the cat rules to Otis. I told him that I was the #1 cat and that I made the rules and that I wasn't to be messed with if he knew what was good for him.

Arlo wasn't too sure about him but figured he might get used to little Otis if he didn't make any trouble.

Things looked like they might work out until Daddy came in that night and told Mommy that he thought he heard a kitten down near the shop. Mommy went out with the flashlight. At first she only saw the barn-cats who were sitting around having a cat-meeting, but then she heard a kitten cry. She found Charlotte hiding behind the tractor tire and grabbed her. Charlotte wasn't too thrilled about being grabbed, but Mommy knows how to grab kitties so they don't scratch her up. Mommy said Charlotte was really really scared.

Charlotte was happy to see Otis, and he was happy to see her, too. It was obvious that they were brother and sister. They snuggled up together, and I think Otis might have told her that she was in a good place and didn't have to be scared any more. But two new kitties certainly complicates things.

Mommy was mad that someone had taken these little kitties away from their mama way too young. She was even madder that someone dumped them. I would like to scratch the face of whoever did it.

Speaking of scratching, Otis shared his scratch-tower with her. It used to be my tower but I got too big for it.

Otis likes to sit on top of the tower and pretend he's king. But he knows I'm the real king of cats around here.

Anyhow, it looks like those kitties have made themselves at home. I told Mommy that Arlo would have to raise them because I wasn't getting involved and Alfreda doesn't like them.

Because we have two more mouths to feed (and those kitties eat like pigs!), It would help if you bought some of Mommy's books. (She told me to say this.)