Ads of Age

When you get old elderly, there's a big increase in certain kinds of mail you get—ads from retirement communities and funeral homes, for instance. Here are a couple I recently found in my mailbox.

So, I can "enjoy nature" at an upscale old folks' home? I've driven past the one in the above ad, and I didn't see much nature. I did see a very busy road going past it.

As for the funeral pre-planning, that's something I've been planning to do (my mother prepaid her burial arrangements and it worked very well). After all, I already have a tombstone* marking my spot in the family cemetery.

 I plan to opt for the "single cash payment"instead of the layaway plan "affordable monthly payments."

The strangest elderly-targeted mail that came recently was a card that unfolded. From the front, I thought it might be some sort of a humorous greeting card.

But it wasn't. I unfolded it to reveal this:

Was someone laughing at another's allergies, maybe? That's not funny. I opened another fold:

If you're having trouble reading that page (elderly with poor eyesight, perhaps), here's a closer look.

Carilion Clinic, our local health-related mega-business, is advertising for one of its, uh, services?!

I didn't find Carilion's attempt at humor laughable at all. In fact, it pissed me off.

~

*Actually, my second tombstone; the first one went missing.